Building a Foundation of Self Confidence

Think about the times when you feel most confident at work. Is it when you’re running a staff meeting, analyzing reports, or talking with your customers? These situations are where your strengths and talents shine through and you handle them easily and effortlessly. Now think of the times when you are uncomfortable – making a formal presentation, meeting with a prospective customer, or interviewing job candidates, for instance. Drawing on self confidence in these situations can calm our nerves and give us the ability to face new things head-on. Others’ perception of us is their reality, so do all you can to influence them positively! Napoleon Hill says in Step 3 of his Self Confidence Formula (see below) to devote 10 minutes a day on developing it. Here are some ideas on how to do so:

Vocabulary: Listen to the words you use and how you speak of yourself, especially when nervous. Downplaying successes and pooh-poohing compliments send messages about our confidence level to others. Stay positive, self-supportive, and remember your previous achievements.

Self-Talk: What do you say to yourself when you make a mistake or are faced with a new challenge? Feeding your mind positive, loving thoughts about yourself are just as important as feeding your body with good food and exercise. Create some affirmations to help you through tough spots – “I am capable and confident”…”I handle new situations easily”. Appreciate your own best qualities and strengths.

Be Present: Put away distractions, especially all things that light up, beep and buzz. Be present with the person you’re meeting with – listen, interact, and make them your priority at that moment. Being fully present with them is truly a foundation for solid business relationships.

Posture: Pay attention to how you sit and stand when doing something unfamiliar. Take a stance that tells people you’re open to receiving information and input, while keeping in mind what accomplishments and benefits you already bring to the table.

Voice: In addition to words, pay attention to how you sound. Speaking calmly and confidently at a steady volume conveys trustworthiness and competence. Record yourself speaking before you enter into new territory.

Appearance: Be comfortable in your professional attire. Fidgeting with a stiff collar or itchy fabric will detract from your verbal message. Sometimes that tried and true older garment is better than something expensive and new. Dry clean, mend, iron and polish it up to make a great first impression.

Eye contact: Look people in the eye even when you’re uncomfortable. Making a connection via the eyes settles everyone’s uneasiness and helps express sincerity, openness, and interest.

Accomplishments: Remind yourself of what you’ve done successfully in the past. Chances are that you’ll pull from that previous experience to help you push through any new unfamiliar ones. Keep a running list of monthly successes and review it often and definitely before stepping into a new event.

Visualize: Close your eyes and imagine the task ahead already successfully accomplished. Do what the athletes do – play it out in your mind over and over again, so when the actual time comes, you’re comfortable and exude confidence.

Forgive & Forget: Get over any past mistakes that may hold you back as you encounter this new challenge. Think about it one last time, talk it out, forgive the parties involved, and let it go. Don’t carry it into what can be an exciting future.

Practice all these things and your confidence will soar. People will want to do business with you, have you handle their accounts, make referrals to you – all because of the way you come across and make them feel.

Having confidence helps us grow personally and professionally, and create dynamic exciting lives with new challenges and positive outcomes. By building confidence, you will carry yourself with respect and dignity, better connect with employees, customers and colleagues, and build a life of integrity.